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Dear Carolyn: My husband is uncomfortable with our 20-year-old white son dating a black woman.

Some black people have said it jokingly, and some white people have said it to black people, fetishizing and reducing them to the color of their skin.So it's no wonder this is a red flag to many people or why there was backlash. It could be a sign that a person views black people solely to sexualize them.When it was announced that Rachel Lindsay would be the Bachelorette — the first black woman to take the position — I wondered how the producers would handle it.I also wondered how it would make the show different, and how it would stay the same.Aside from the historical separation of black people and white people, there are a few barriers you should get out of the way in the present…

just so you're on the same page (and not one from an American history book).

It can be a bit alarming, just because of how different the hair quality is.

It lands both parties in completely different events.

She acted perfectly fine with it, and even referred to it as line.

This awkward sexualization isn't uncommon for black women in the dating world, and neither are the other racist undertones of the season.

Kodak Black’s feelings about African-American women didn’t sit well with pretty much everyone, leading to strong and rather comical reactions.